Brave Thoughts

     So its yoga inspiration time! I was so very thankful after going a week without, because of labor day, to be able to get back to the mat. My pain levels from my fibromyalgia rose, the mysterious swelling in my back got worse and my anxiety rose, though there wasn't much to be anxious about. This week my husband mentioned how he noticed a difference in my mood and behavior. My mind was in such a disarray. I was so excited to get grounded again especially after the enormous storm that hit Arizona. My body itself felt like it was going to float away. It was nice after a spectacular storm to feel grounded again.

     This weeks message was Brave Thoughts...this one has made me want to study further what God says about our thoughts. We are aware God knows our thoughts and that our thoughts themselves can be sinful...but I want to go beyond that. Our thoughts often lead to our actions, which I think is very true, and have experienced this in my own life. We all know what happens when you get stuck in the track of negative thoughts, your quality of life reflects those thoughts. It sometimes feels easier to just continue to think in that way. But it is truly brave to break out of the sinfulness and the negativity and it is not easy, especially when maybe you are surrounded by negative words. This in itself is what has led me to try to think more in a positive light and not one in fear, anxiety, and negativity. However, truth be told I struggle with this a lot. Especially with anxiety!
      I have been reading a lot about what God says about worry and anxiety. This is part of why I started this Journey, but I want to admit, even though I feel like I am growing in faith and I do constantly remind myself God is in control, God will provide, and so on but I still feel anxiety. I have seen Gods promises as he has showed me in my own life, but even though I know this, I can't rid the anxiety I feel creeping in my body. When searching for Christian perspective this is what I often find your faith isn't strong enough, you aren't really trusting God, Natural Healing (where I have found most peace) isn't ok for Christians to use.  This makes me want to curl up in a hole and just give up, these themselves are negative words (even if they are said with best intention), and have stabbed me over and over. It makes me feel broken or that it is something I am doing or not doing that is causing anxiety and that I have no faith in God, which just simply isn't true.
     When I can focus on me and block all these negative words and thoughts I realize that maybe my body just isn't working quite right or something in my environment is affecting me. I know at the worst of my depression and anxiety we were being exposed to black mold, am I just still showing symptoms of exposure especially since I am still cleaning many contaminated items. I think we need to accept the fact while God's words are definitely needed and provide comfort (as they certainly have for me) that there are other aspects to anxiety and depression that may have nothing to do with the strength of our faith. These are Brave words for me to say.
     There was more to the Brave Thoughts message however these were my own thoughts while I practiced yoga and had time to reflect with God. I truly believe God wants me to be brave to continue growing in my faith, to think positively and with intent, to continue learning to be present and to continue in my path of natural healing, the way I believe he intended health care to be. I continue to pray on the matter as I search God's word for answers to my anxiety, but I feel I am on the right track. Even though I am meeting some resistance in the way I am choosing to heal, but that is between God and I.

What is going on in your life? How are your thoughts and actions brave? Are you being Brave in your thoughts and actions? Do your thoughts hold the truth of God?